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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Mon Aug 25, 2014 11:25 pm 
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Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2012 3:06 pm
Posts: 452
I haven't found the magazine yet even though I have searched. Will try to remember what the article was about so the title would have some meaning. 8-)


Last edited by Marian on Wed Aug 27, 2014 10:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 10:00 am 
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Joined: Wed Jan 11, 2012 6:05 pm
Posts: 2705
Tony Blackburn was the one to really make you groan with a capital G. We had a book of his ones when we were kids.


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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 8:43 pm 
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I have never watched I'm a Celebrity ... but happened to catch Tony Blackburn saying something which made me fall about laughing. I can't remember what he said or if he was actually meaning to be funny but I can see his face now. Something just so funny about his expression and tone as he said it (whatever it was). I was always a fan when he was a DJ. in the early 70's. I can't remember any Groaners of his though. :-)


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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 10:46 pm 
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Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2012 2:31 pm
Posts: 635
Location: England
I must confess I've bought a tim Vine Joke Book, here are some from it:

- I haven't seen a cowboy film for ages. It's all quiet on the Western front.

- I was having dinner with chess champion Gary Kasparov and we had a black and white tablecloth. It took him 2 hours to pass me the salt.

-When I run around naked I can be very cruel. I've got a ruthless streak.

- I went to a therapy group to help me cope with loneliness and no one else turned up.

- Tiger Woods has got a terrible temper. Isaid to him, do you like golf buggies? He went off on one.


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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 1:23 am 
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Joined: Wed Jan 11, 2012 6:05 pm
Posts: 2705
Lollllllllllllllllllll, as they say nowadays!


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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 11:00 am 
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Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2012 2:31 pm
Posts: 635
Location: England
Have you heard of that new style of cricket? The only way you can be out is by LBW, bowled or stumped. I know what you're thinking. Where's the catch?

For a long time I thought Perth was where a woman with a lisp keeps her money.

Tequila, Schnapps, Sambucca! I'm calling the shots.

So I was up all night wondering what happened to the sun and suddenly it dawned on me.


Last edited by Rich Kid on Mon Sep 01, 2014 8:44 am, edited 2 times in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Mon Sep 01, 2014 12:08 am 
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Posts: 2705
:D :D :D


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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Mon Sep 01, 2014 8:26 pm 
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Posts: 635
Location: England
So I said to this bloke, I said me and a friend just cycled across the desert with our legs exposed. He said, tandem? I said we certainly did.

Last night I dreamt I was the author of 'Lord of the Rings'. I was Tolkien in my sleep.

This bloke said to me, he said do you want to use my ice rink for 10p? I thought, what a cheap skate.

So I bought this DVD and in the extras it said 'Deleted Scenes'. When I had a look there was nothing there.


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 Post subject: Re: Tim Vine
PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 8:42 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 08, 2014 10:17 pm
Posts: 5
I said to my dog "heel". So he put on a white coat and went down to the local hospital.

The dog was on the sofa - i said "get down"... So jumped off and started bustin some moves...


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